What I Don’t Want for Christmas!

There aren’t many shopping hours left, but for anyone who might still be thinking of surprising me with a gift this year, I have a few suggestions. Folks who know me well have learned that–for whatever reason–I’m not very good at coming up with a list of desired gifts. That hasn’t changed, but I do have a list of things to please steer clear of when trying to get a present for me:

 

  • A Hoverboard – Even before we found out they’re prone to spontaneous combustion I was saying “no way”. While I love to ride a Segway, I’ve no desire to break my neck on a motorized skateboard. Besides, it’s just another gadget that begs for a helmet—an obvious safety need, but not my favorite hair accessory.
  • An Apple Watch – While I absolutely love my iPhone and go into a panic if separated from it for more than 5 minutes, I’ve no desire at all to strapping onto my wrist a smaller, harder to read version requiring many hours of advanced technological training to operate. And then it requires me to keep my iPhone with me at the same time. Geeky people, please, what’s the point?? Can you say “redundant”?
  • The Miss Universe Title for 2.5 minutes – Poor Miss Columbia!! Ever the briefest taste of victory and then the agony of defeat. Spare me, please…not that there ever has been the slightest possibility that I would compete.
  • A Fitbit – Now don’t get me wrong, because I do exercise regularly. I just don’t get the attraction of a device that seems so easy to game. Put that little guy on top of the washer during the spin cycle, and you’ll meet your day’s goal. So what’s the point? Either get some exercise or don’t. And if you want something to motivate you, just ask your mom and she’ll be happy to nag at you to get up off the couch and do something.
  • Any kind of Veggie Juicer – the Nutribullet is a popular item this season, but you needn’t get one for me. While I’m a fan of being healthy, I simply don’t want to drink my days’ worth of vegetables. Sorry. Unless you add a bunch of sugar, some ice cream, and chocolate, I seriously doubt that there’s any way I could get the concoction down. Now if you see a great milkshake machine, that would work as the start of my “what I want for Christmas” list.

 

OK, that’s enough reading. Time to get back to shopping and with these eliminations you’re now free to focus on finding something I do want. Anyone know where there’s a Milkshake machine on sale?